15 Things You Can Do When Your Cat Dies

You have had a cherished relationship with your cat which has been a vital part of your life. So when you lose this special bond, you are reaching out for someone who has always been there but is no longer. Consequently, you may suffer nearly overwhelming grief, pain, and loss. Recovery takes time, finally getting you to a point where you can enjoy the fondest memories of your cat without having to continue to suffer. You discover that it is okay for you to still feel sad and want to talk about your pet.

What makes grieving so hard is that there are obstacles to expressing your grief and loss. Our western society tends to trivialize pet loss and the deep relationship it represents. Too often you hear others say dismissively, "It was only a cat." Or, "You can always get another one." Not everyone values non-human beings. Moreover, even people who care frequently find speaking about grief and loss to be awkward.

Catnip Plants

The result is you are left in emotional isolation with few ways to share your intense feelings of shock and disbelief, denial, anger, guilt, or despair. Sometimes you may feel you have to hide or deny your grief because others consider it unacceptable. But doing so prolongs your pain and the healing process. At this time you need an understanding and empathetic ear, support, and guidance. But since professional pet-loss resources may be hard to find, there are other things you can do to say a loving "good-bye" and process your grief.

You can:

1. Collect photographs of your cat for a scrapbook and/or framed montage picture to hang on the wall to recall the good times.

2. Push aside the last sad moments to remember the fun you shared over the years.

3. Write a gratitude letter to your cat and read it aloud at burial, cremation, or other situation.

4. If you choose burial, construct a coffin and decorate it with all the things that you and your friend enjoyed: catnip, brush, collar, toy, tags, and photographs.

5. Have a ceremony and plant your cat's favorite plant at the grave site.

6. If you choose cremation, have a ceremony and sprinkle the ashes someplace meaningful.

7. Put the urn of ashes where you can remember your cat's love with a smile.

8. Share stories of your cat's antics with animal-loving friends.

9. Find a pet-loss support group to help you move through the grief process.

10. Put your cat's tags on your key chain.

11. Make a wristlet of your cat's collar.

12. Volunteer at an animal rescue group or shelter to give attention to animals who desperately need it.

13. Consider having another cat when you feel ready.

14. Accept that your new companion will have its own identity, personality, and behaviors.

15. Know you can create a new bond of happiness that does not discount your last cat's relationship.

As long as you keep positive memories alive, you will never totally lose your beloved former cat companion.

15 Things You Can Do When Your Cat Dies